Well the day has finally come where blogging has come to the iPhone in a east to use app.

This is my first post in a long time, but hopefully now this would help me on the move to post more.

the difference between average people and achieving people is their perception of and response to failure - J.C. Maxwell

it is my belief and i am sure that many would accept that the only true way to move forward is to fall or run into a problem in the present….if there was no problem / failure our chart would not be increasing but would be a constant line…where is the progress in that? however those who fall and learn from their mistakes and or respond with a positive perception of what just happen usually jump far ahead….Steve Jobs, Michael Jordan, William Clinton, Amitabh Bachan & Albert Einstein — four individuals who are highly respected in their own field respectively…all had some point in time fallen….if it wasnt for their will to move forward…or their perception of their failture….we would not some of the greatest political theories, sport history, entertainment, scentific knowledge and of course the ability to use our hands on our mobile device so intuitively….

what makes them different from us? a special gene? schooling? friends? status? —what?

my answer on a very broad look is NOTHING! except for the fact that they had the ability to endure failture and the outlook of growth on their minds…usually what happens when something irregular happens in our lives…we look for the cause or the event to blame that caused us to fall…we spend so much time in seeking that…and truth be told 99 % we dont even know what it is…we try and try to find something and at the end because we do not want to blame ourselves we blame others or find a fault in theory or application…

why not use that time to look ahead of the the causes or reasons why something happened….and try to go forward in thinking what can I DO to make this a success….and with that in mind….try to find the error in your implementation….was it a coding issue? if so how can i resolve it? was it a mis-communication(spelling?)? if so what can i do to be more clear ( what can I do…) what is a conflict of nature/personalities? if so what can i do to move this forward?

Guruhari Swami Shree has always said that its easier for the self to change than to try to change another individual….and that to A LOT easier to change a group …and a mass…its easier to bypass someones comments than to try to prevent them from saying it….ignorance is such a disease..that it can only be removed with self relization and or grace/karuna that allows one to see where they are going wrong…one needs to be very alert in their actions that they do not become infected with this time wasting and energy wasting disease….truly it can change not only your vision ..but can ruin your life as a whole…..it only takes one thought to spoil the mind..not more…

Yesterday, i sat in my car and started driving down the street when at the end of road there was this big blue van who stood still at the stop sign for more than 15 seconds…. getting restless i was thinking hmm what is going on here, should i go around the car or what….then out of no where this wide and short man comes out…bends down and picks up a pair of scissors.. shows them to me..in a unhappy yet caring manner and tosses it to the side on the grass…

out of no where all my frustration and road rage disappeared…this random act of kindness blew me away..that there are still individuals out there who care for the wellbeing of others?? if i was in the situation and had noticed the the scissors the best i would do is drive around it…but actually getting out and safely taking it off the road….the thought might have come to my mind, but the action of doing it…def not….

so to honor the short, wide white man…..i decided to write this post….to remind me and all those who might read this…that chivalry is always rewarded…in some way or other….

You cant stop a teacher when they want to do something. They just do it!
~ J.D Salinger (The Catcher in the Rye, 1951)

To take words of Ssalinger and take it a step further, no one should be able to stop you when you want to achieve something. many times we are quick to blame others, or circumstance that we tend to forget our own laziness or forget to question our own determination. I have been co-teaching or just helping my co operative teacher for nearly now two full weeks and for the past 3-4 school days i have been observing a young boy who remains very silent. only speaks when he is called on, and iv yet to see him call out without raising his hand. He might have the right answer on his paper, but unless he is called on he wont respond. Comparing him with his peers i feel he has a great level of understanding, but due to some reason i am unaware of, he always seems sad or troubled.

I think in life we have all been this little boy at some point or other. I am not stating that we experiencing something emotional or mentally disruptive as him, but come on let us all admit to ourselves in privacy that at some point or other we are scared, that we do have our own fears….or had them…..i can relate very easily to this young student because, growing up i might have had the correct answer, but was afraid to speak up…and even presently i still have this inner doubt that i wont make it through. However on this aspect i have to give a lot of respect and thanks to my co-op teacher for he has been nothing of fun and understanding.

we all can achieve whatever it is we want. there is not limit to knowledge nor is there on effort. Usually the more sincere effort one shows, somehow he or she is always rewarded. so i think we all need to take a note from Salinger and continue to move forward on our own personal mission.

every so often we tend to drift away from the world. if you are on your feet, you will notice that time to time regardless of where you are or what you are doing….but you tend to take yourself away from life it self…i guess that is what i did with my blog….in the process of trying to get through rough waters…and enter a new world i drifted away from writing…not just on this blog but writing as a whole….i cant remember when i took out time to write a thoughtful email to those who matter the most….or to sit down to write a poem or just jot down some thoughts…..are we really that busy? or am i really that busy? what is it that i am doing wrong here?

today i have to teach a lesson, “were our founding fathers terrorists?” haha..should be interesting….anyways…thats its for now…

i dont get whats wrong with the celebrities in the world…they have the so called perfect material life. Money, fame and some with power…the good ol’ Cali american dream..to grow up and get into hollywood or become a model or what not. but yet they are throwing it away…not saying all the celebs are bad, some are really inspiring and are helping set a good image for the young youth around the world…but whats up with the rest of them? cant control drinking issues, drugs, multiple marriages, multiple marriages with multiple kids, hospitalizations, psych facilities, shootings, and much more…. i ask why?

its such a special gift that god gives, not everyone is able to be an actor not everyone is born with a gifted voice or some talent that propels them very far ahead in the “List” of people…or the social classes of life…unfortunately the raw truth is, there are some people that will work their whole lives — not just work but sincerely work, long shifts, and always remain loyal…but will never be able to get out of their 4×4 room (their home) and there are some that are given the opportunity and jump from that very same room to owning a home that is a size of a relative average size “gham” (village) in India. How?

does that mean, we are destined to be or live a certain way? Of Course not! but i would say for the majority of us…to reach the level (realistic level) we want to reach…there will be a lot of hurdles and a lot of life surrounding situations that will raise doubt not only in us but everything. The majority of us will have to fight harder, will have to endure more pain, will have to cry more tears, and will have to pick ourselves up more…is it fair? seems not…but God can argue YES. Why? well one logic and spiritual reason that iv read and heard from Guruhari Swami Shree is of the following; We all lack certain virtues rather it be loyalty, humbleness, endurance,daasatva, atmiyata, saralta, suruchi, shrad-dha, survirta, nishta, nirdosh-bhoodhi — and this list can continue to be very long. and in order to achieve any one of those “highest universal” virtues God creates a surrounding and creates a situation for us all. We all believe ourselves to have some of those traits, but the truth of that is…we dont have it to the desired level he wants us to have it…One could say, i am strong and survir — if that is so then why are there prasangs in your life? one can say, i have nishta in Guruhari — if that is so then why the ups and downs? I can even say i am loyal — if so how come my mind has fears? Sure we may have a very small % of any one of them, but a cold truth is — thats only our perception.

Samp — not having manushabhav in anyone .. Do we have it? if you say yes, that means you see God in everyone. If you see God in everyone then you are always their daas — without any voice. very difficult but possible…Usually when we fall in life or in a prasang we fall HARD. and depending on our perception we can go Two directions. ONE continue forward TWO fall back…but what does this do for us? This allows us to change our limited thinking into something just a little higher. If you go back in time, and tell someone i can write a letter and send it across the world in seconds they would either laugh at you or shoot you because they might think your evil. but today, our minds easily accept this– WHY? Same in life, Guruhari is trying to take us to his thinking, and our minds are just capped and unwilling to accept…and its hard because how can you accept something you cant see? but that is where TRUE swahday comes in. i say true because true swahday doesnt focus on the problem but focus’ on Swamiji and tries to match HIS life to OURS….incomplete swahday is focusing on the problem and seeing what we can do about it. …TRUE swahday will lead us to Gunatit Purusho to Swamiji…Maharaj himself was kicked out of darbar — what did he do? Shashriji Maharaj begged for money when he was able to risen golden temples in his hands–what did he do? Bapa was always always saral regardless of who was right and how much beating he got — what did he do? Swamiji got spat on, kicked at, given poison, stolen from, etc etc — what did he do? and what are we doing?? Why ask all this? Simple –Who was happier THEM or US? Am i as equally happy as bapa? as Swamiji? NO! why? will i get there? YES — but i have to continue to get up when i fall and continue to see THERE glory not my own personal life….

every person has their own special gift to give to others, no one gift is the same. many times we begin looking for gifts that we have already seen in us or in others…by doing this we close our hearts and minds off to others who are equally as special as you and i….every smile every laugh every tear drop is different in its own way…it is up to us to see the gift that others have, it become our responsibility not to laugh at them if they think differently, if there smile is different…they too have a heart and they to are gift to all mankind.

every moment in time gives us an opportunity to see these gifts these talents that we all possess. if someone doesnt work in our way or if something doesnt seem right to us..doesnt mean it isnt right…many times we use our emotions to feel everything in the world, but to fail to feel the pain in others….we use it to feel our happiness, we use it to feel our sorrow, we use it to feel our excitements….but how often do we use the very same emotions for someone else? do we really feel their pain? can we bask in the same happiness as they do?

not everyone is born to be a doctor, engineer, scientist…because we are not born with careers…we make them….we can become anyone we want to be….just because you are a doctor and i am a teacher doesnt mean you are smarter or better — does it? we all have our gifts…today my heart melted, and it cried many times over….for even i fail to see the gifts in others…even i close my mind off them and that truly isnt fair…it could be cleaning or organizing….its a gift…instead of discouraging it…we should open our hearts our minds and our arms to all…instead of asking why didnt you do that? why not ask, why is that the right way? instead of saying why did you do that again? why not ask how can we do it differently?

we are all special doesnt mean we cannot live together or work together…just because two or three or four individuals have their own thinking own emotions and own habits….why cant we open our hearts and minds to them all….after all are they not human? are they not trying? if we cherish them as a gift to us….then and then only will our hearts and minds open to accept them….for the way they are….

looking up at the sky i only saw a few stars, what makes them so special that i can only see them? NOTHING…i just have to look inside my mind and i will see all the stars….even those in the dark….

we are all special in our own ways…..dont let go because one cannot understand….instead embrace and hold on tighter so they dont feel alone….because the worse punishment anyone can give …is not being able to understand that we are I am different…i am not dumb, or mean, or stupid….i am me…..hold me ….let me stay in your thoughts, heart..spirit….dont push me away because you do not understand me….because that pain is the worse pain….not only for that person….but to mankind/satsang/ life…..because you are taking away a gift that god gave them all…

Guruhari Swami Shree — with putting aside his divinity…..Guruhari Swami Shree is the only person who has bothered to stand next to me…who has bothered to care for me to love me….to dry my tears…..when no one else was willing to understand who i am…he has done that for all….when we screw up in life…we dont go to our parents..WHY? simple because we know they wont understand…when our own parents dont understand….how can Swami Shree? simple…because he sees’ each action each breathe we take as a gift….screwing up in life is a gift that we all have…but how many times has someone yelled at you for it? and how many times has someone embraced you for it?

We are born with a nature — some are tempered some are moody some are emotional and some are intellectually efficient…Swami Shree has accepted me and all of us however we are…regardless of we are….why cant we do follow that on to others? if not others why not our family? if not our family why not each other? we all need to progress towards a better self…and we are all doing that in our own way……but why punish someone if they are different?? if we continue to punish all those are different from yourself / myself then pretty soon life will become boring and lonely because a time will come when even you are not happy with yourself….then what?

Ever wonder why things dont work out the way we want them to? Seriously, how come India couldnt win the World Cup, how come they cant beat Aussies in a series…and why is it that every knocks on sachin and dravid? furthermore how come we cant get into the classes we want, or be at the level in we want to be? why is it so difficult to match our thinking with our actions? why is it in my brain i am able to fly and in reality i cant jog more then 2 laps? why is it in my head i can bowl a 300 game and in reality im stuck at 203. why is it in my head, i can roam the world…and in reality im stuck here for now….

why is it that our dreams lead our actions and our actions are the pre-cursor for our dreams? who wrote this script, and why does 2 +2 have to equal 4…why? i guess if everything worked according to our desires, life would become very boring very fast…what am i suppose to do after i get the 300 games, roam everywhere, jog a million laps…what next? i think the part of life that is hidden but yet is everywhere is Challenge…i think striving for something for a extended period of time, and then attaining it brings more fruits a longer lasting happiness or excitement then just having it given to you…

so my word of advise for those handful that read my blog, — take the challenge that life has given you….when you fall get up and keep moving…even if you fall…fall forward…even if you stop for a short time, dont give up….and even if nothing works out the way you want it to..its easier to change what it is you want then having to change the world….dont make the mistake of giving up and and then bringing your self-esteem down, your confidence, your hopes, your dreams, your vision to a point where life become depressing without having any memories…remember we dictate our thoughts, we dictate our emotions, and we are the sole authority on what we can and what we cannot do….

living in the age of modern medicine and pop a pill thinking, i was thinking lets kick it back to the age of rishis and yogis. for some time now i have been trying to start doing pranayam on a regular basis. but no matter how much internally i want to do it, my physical body is just lazy and unwilling to spend the whole 10 mins that i need to perform it…why is that? is my body in control am i ? if i am, then how come my internal thoughts are not matching with my external reactions? all good questions, im sure — because i thought about them…but for this answer i will need call on my buddy, my pal, my role model, and my 2nd best friend…any guesses who?

HOUSE!

according to House “People choose the paths that grant them the greatest rewards for the least amount of effort.” so in line with that thought, are we not all guilty of this at some point in our week? how many times have we stopped chewing and just swallowed so we can return back to the tube, or where ever it is that you had to be? how many times in the day do we actually take time out to think what it is that we actually did today? in some matrix way, we have all turned into computers, who want the best results with the least amount of effort. what happened to the good ol elbow grease?

How many shortcuts do we take in a week? or better yet for some people like me, how many short cuts do we take in a day? luckily House doesnt take shortcuts — sure the 5 - 6 vicodin he swallows in a day, and making his team work the clinic hours, and basically having Wilson pay for his stuff is all helping the greater good…but even House himself makes sure he goes over every possible reason small or even smaller before throws in the towel….heck thats why he is the best…

Like House we all need to learn the secrets of when to take shortcuts and when not to…unfortunately there is no physical conscious to walk with us. but for the longest time now Guruhari Swami Shree has been telling us to do one thing, and that is Swahday Bhajan…to where now he is saying 30 mins bhajan…fully knowing that we are not capable of doing it..he continues to say do it for 5 mins…2 mins…but start NOW!…how many of us have started? is this one of the shortcuts we want to take? ..and by taking it are we really being granted the most happiness?

its very difficult knowing something and not being able to express it….its even more difficult believing something and not being able to let go of it…many times i get agitated by some event that i know internally i cannot control…and even mentally i know what i am suppose to do what i am suppose to think….yet it doesnt happen…sometimes its like why cant someone just let go of it…but in perspective its more important for me myself to let go of it….

today was election day, and of course being a good citizen i went out to vote…

i also worked on the mandir website for nearly six hours…encoding and editing…creating and implementing…if i spend nearly half that time on my site…i just wonder what i can do…but actually what happens is…mandir site keeps me motivated keeps me innovative keeps me thinking of something more and beyond…and by the time i get home…iv just had enough of html i can handle….

although i want to get a nice digital camera so i can create a web section…however i am going to try to get pictures up soon using my phone…lets see how that project goes….haha..

anyways time to go to sleep…